She said men should help more with child-rearing and domestic duties and that we should also stop our nutty obsession with achieving a youthful appearance, being perfectly groomed and having a lovely home. Yeah, we knew all that, too.
But just where do we start with the stopping? So much of the hurly burly of modern women's lives is unavoidable but, then again, so much of our discontent is self-inflicted. I was recently reminded of just how punishing our regimen of perfection is when I attended the 50th birthday party of a friend. She isn't a career woman living in a posh postcode with an executive husband and a retinue of paid help, but just a stay-at-home mum with a husband who's a tradesman.
In another time we'd have dressed in our next-to-best and brought a plate to help with the catering. It would have been understood that the house furnishings were modest, but that our hosts were perhaps saving up for something more presentable. "Perfect" was only seen in ads for Westinghouse or Whirlpool where housewives in pearls and gingham aprons were queens of domesticity.
How, half a century later, women have embraced this ideal of perfection along with their new incarnations as career women and bread winners is a mystery. "Have it all" now means "be it all" and "do it all".
At the birthday party, all the female guests presented themselves in new frocks and shoes, freshly painted finger and toenails, blow-dried hair and shiny accessories. They were as glamorous as any cartoon moms of the 1950s. Time seemed to have excused the men who, in basic T-shirts and cargo pants, all stood back as the women greeted each other with exclamations of approval. "Divine shoes!" "Gorgeous dress!" "Love your hair!" "Have you lost weight?" One of the husbands, standing next to me, marvelled: "They look amazing, don't they? You'd never think they were all 50 with kids."
I immediately wondered what would be wrong with that. He certainly looked his age, paunchy middle, balding head, gnarly toenails and all. The food was wonderful: home-made canapés produced from a kitchen bristling with the latest appliances that would do MasterChef proud. Gourmet pizzas from the new wood-fired pizza oven. The decor wasn't outrageously priced designer stuff but, I noticed from last time I'd been there, new. New cushions, throw rugs, funky lampshades and the couch had been re-covered. In the loo were flowers, scented candles, hostess soaps and waffle-weave hand towels.
We women chatted. The topic? How busy we all were. Again, I wondered, what was all this feverish female endeavour for? Who were we trying to impress? The answer is: other women. Domestic goddesses, yummy mummies, WAGS and celebrity mothers haunt us with their perfect lifestyles and size-zero outfits.
Seems we're all living under the curse of impossible perfection. Ladies, could we, as one, make a pact to let ourselves, our homes, our lives, go...just a little? Promise I'll go first. I've come up with a few things we could stop doing, right now.
1) Stop cooking as if it's a competition.
In the 1950s, a lot of time and effort was put into inventing "convenience" foods. The supermarket shelves are now stuffed with packet gravies, tinned and frozen stuff, cake mixes and, quelle horreur, instant Pavlova! I won't notice you've used them after a cocktail or two. In fact, give me a can of UDL and ring Domino's. I'll still respect you in the morning.
2) Stop redecorating.
Don't read those magazines that tell you shabby chic is "out" and understated monochromatic elegance is "in". That ripped cushion with the buttons hanging by a thread tells me you have more important things to attend to. I won't judge you for having a stained couch, I swear. When the kids leave home you can paint over the scuff marks; until then, leave them. I think they give your house personality and make me feel better about my own imperfect life. Let's all agree to redecorate only once every 15 years.
3) Stop buying fashion magazines.
Since when did the compliment "I've always loved you in that dress" become an insult? New clothes, shoes and accessories take up space, not only in your home, but in your head. Too much choice takes up time and energy. Toss those dumb - and fake - how-to-look-good-at-any-age articles in the bin. They only make you feel bad.
4) Stop spending good money on beauty bandits.
You'd think the man of the house was pathetic if he called the NRMA to fix a flat tyre, yet you'll spend big bucks on a pedicure. What's that about? With the time and money it takes to drive, park, sit and pay, it doesn't add up. Paint your own damn toenails. Blow-dry your own hair. Bin the wrinkle creams. They don't work and you know it.
5) Stop complimenting other women on their appearance.
Don't tell me I look young for my age. I don't. And what would be the point if I did? Instead, greet friends with how good it is to be in their company, no matter what the hell they look like. You can't complain that men judge women by their appearance when we do exactly the same.
6) Stop trying to "self-improve".
Oprah bangs on about "living your best life", but what if you never have that "aha!" moment? That divine inspiration or epiphany? Could be because you're already living the life that's meant for you? You're already good enough. So are your kids. So are your friends and family. We all love you.
A life that's good enough. That's what I'm proud of. The rest is a 60-year-old cartoon.
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